Woke this morning and really thinking about some things.
Jesus ministry was so much more than forgiveness for our sin so we can go to heaven. There is a fullness of the cross that most never see. I remember thinking in a very dark time of my life that I know if I was to die that I would go to heaven, but the life that I was walking was not a fullness. I never had peace, I seldom had something to laugh about, who could feel free when you have a constant weight on your chest. Those were my days and nights. I had this longing in my heart to have more.
Being free today, I am always thinking about freedom for others. I am consumed with Jesus and all that he did. In his 3 year ministry he 1- proclaimed the gospel of the KINGDOM 2- healed the sick and cast out demons he did so much more but for now today I am thinking about these 2 things.
I am looking back on all the time I spent in church and thinking there is so much effort put out in saving the lost, getting us all together, and lifting the name of Jesus. What happens if your a Christian like ME. (USED TO BE) Your saved but you feel bound and chained. OPPRESSED, DEPRESSED,FULL OF WORRY AND FEAR. We really get all this teaching on things in the natural but we never really hear of the spirit world. It is real! Those of us that have been there know the darkness is something that just swallows you up. It is like nothing that can even have a description. There is a song by Skillet, called Monster! It feels like there is a secret side of yourself that you feel like no one should ever see! You keep it caged but there is no control. You want people to stay away from you because it makes you feel ugly. It feels like it is constantly after you, it is in your head. You just want to be put out of your misery! The song says "I must confess that I feel like a monster!" "I hate what I have become!' There is a secret side that you keep under lock and key! The song goes on and on with darkness! I remember the first time I heard it I remember thinking "really someone could write a song like this! they are describing ME!" I had Kenny listen to it and it was sad that he could see that the song FIT! yuck! How could he even love me? But then wait, WHY? WHY would a christian band write something like this. Does this mean that they have never found freedom? SO many questions ran threw my head. I really started to listen to the words of songs and thinking so much pain, does anyone sing of freedom and peace. In my heart peace was all I wanted and I was willing to do anything to get it. WOULD SOMEONE POINT ME THE WAY!
Finally God put some amazing people in my path and they pointed the direction and I walked! These amazing people never told me what to do. They allowed the Holy Spirit to give me revelation on my own. With a lot of hard work and determination I am here today FREE AND I HAVE PEACE. Praise God.
Back to Jesus, There was purpose in my past! PASSION for my future!!
Jesus died so that Yes we would go to heaven and that is AMAZING all in itself BUT there is more.
The fullness of the cross. He died for so much more! He died to save, deliver, protect, heal, preserve, MAKE WHOLE,
This journey has left me with a passion to go the extra step. Once your saved no matter what age you are, you have history, you have a past. For some of us that mean WOUNDS.
The word WOUNDED in the Bible comes from the term PIERCED, as if stabbed. It is not a physical stabbing- but a soul that is left crying out. Theses are deep lacerations of the heart. INVISIBLE~ NOT DETECTABLE!
Someone needs to sit down and take some time to help find these WOUNDS.
We live in a space and time where everything is always telling you to let the past be the past. Some of us have had emotional trauma~ Some things resulted in our own sinfulness and some things that we had no part in causing. Most advice leads you to a place where your only lead to stuff the pain. Trying to keep a lid on it, but no matter what you do it keeps bubbling up and boiling over. Leaving you feeling like a MONSTER!
JESUS CAME TO HEAL THESE THINGS!
JESUS CAME TO DO SO MUCH MORE THAN GIVE US ENTRY TO HEAVEN.
HE CAME TO GIVE US THE KEYS TO THE KINGDOM!
HE CAME THAT WE WOULD HAVE LIFE AND HAVE IT ABUNDANTLY!
Being on the other side it has become my prayer and passion to be that bridge. My eyes are open, I see the enemy and his destruction! My journey was HARD! I fell down, and I ALWAYS GOT BACK UP! YOU HAVE TO FIGHT FOR IT!
The journey is all about your identity! Your identity will be found in HIM!
The journey starts with experience of WHO God is for you? You need to have experience of WHO God is for you to build on. The first thing God taught me was that I COULD TRUST HIM! can you?
CAN YOU TRUST HIM??? If not allow the experience to come that will show you that you can!!
LOVE YOU MOST!